BMW R nineT: The Classic Ride Liberals Wish Would Sink

BMW R nineT: The Classic Ride Liberals Wish Would Sink

The BMW R nineT is a classic marvel that harks back to the heyday of motorcycles with its blend of vintage aesthetics and modern engineering, keeping freedom alive on open roads.

Vince Vanguard

Vince Vanguard

Let's dive into the roaring world of motorcycles with the BMW R nineT, the classic ride that's sure to keep even the staunchest eco-warrior awake at night. BMW, the icon of German engineering, first introduced this beauty in 2013, in an attempt to blend vintage aesthetics with modern engineering. If you're out on the open roads of Montana or cruising through the forests of Oregon, you might wonder why cities drenched in bike lanes are getting it all wrong while missing out on the pure rush of something like this. Why have a Prius when you can have a machine that screams freedom at the top of its lungs?

  1. A Nod to the Good Old Days: The R nineT captures the essence of what made motorcycles great in yesteryears with its retro styling and minimalist appeal. It's not just a piece of engineering; it's a piece of art. The R nineT brings back the feel of the 70s and 80s roadsters, which seems to irritate those who believe anything pre-90s should be confined to a museum.

  2. The Humming Heart: Tucked beneath its vintage exterior is an air/oil-cooled 1,170cc engine—a smooth yet potent beast that delivers 107 horsepower. Indeed, it’s hearty and loud enough to give sound pollution advocates a heart attack. Attempting to wrap the blankets of noise regulations around this machine is like asking a hawk to sing like a sparrow.

  3. Customization Galore: It's basically a blank canvas for its owner. With almost limitless customization options, it empowers individuals to create a bike that suits their preferences. The idea of individual freedom and personalization is not something mass transit or cookie-cutter vehicles indulge in.

  4. Built for the Open Road: The R nineT is about as far removed from hand-holding ‘riding assistance‘ like adaptive cruise control and lane-keeping as you can get. This isn’t the kind of bike that’s trying to help you sip on your latte while driving to work. It demands attention, and the reward is the symphony of mechanics and road.

  5. A Frame that Traverses All Terrain: With its robust frame, the R nineT feels at home on highways and adventurous backroads alike. Those broken yet breathtaking rural roads? It's got you covered. Let's be honest, the beauty of America shouldn't be experienced through an app-controlled steering wheel.

  6. Style That Speaks Before the Engine Roars: Its look is timeless, with minimalistic design lines, a quality tank, round headlight, and no excess fluff. It kicks decorative styling to the curb. If you’re the kind who appreciates an espresso shot rather than a venti soy milk iced frappuccino, then this fits right with your taste.

  7. A Legacy to Lure the Brave: The R nineT is more than a bike; it's a piece of BMW's ongoing legacy. Something crafted to stand the test of time, in an era where cheap alternatives come and go like reality TV stars' careers.

  8. The Unmistakable Soundtrack: Let’s talk acoustics; the R nineT's exhaust note is the kind of music you won't find on any streaming service, and for good reason. Its sound is as invigorating as a Beethoven symphony for petrolheads.

  9. Twist and Turn Like No Other: With its powerful telelever front suspension and paralever rear suspension, the R nineT handles like no other. Whether commuting or chasing horizons, every trip is its own narrative with twists and turns that leave a mark in your soul.

  10. Pricing and True Value: With its price hovering around $15,000, the R nineT offers an unbeatable deal for what it represents. The satisfaction of owning something that merges passion and performance isn’t usually listed on the label of price tags by electric car manufacturers pulling the wool over drivers' eyes.

The BMW R nineT stands as a testament to what it means to truly ride. With its classic design, powerful engine, and promise of customization, it offers freedom that mainstream trends seem to have forgotten. It's a reminder that innovation doesn't always mean abandoning what worked before, but rather, perfecting it. It’s a rebellious shoutout to the riders who long for the wind on their face without a politically-correct glass cage around them.